| March 21, 2005 Again, sorry it's been so long since I've updated the website. I've sat down numerous times, but just didn't know what to say. So I thought I would just sit down and start typing :) It's so unbelievable to think that Paige has been gone almost 9 months. We're keeping busy working and spending time with family and friends. I took a few weeks off in early March to help my mom after having a total knee replacement. Originally the surgery was scheduled in 2003, but with Paige's diagnosis the surgery was put off. Her pain had increased significantly and her ability to get around was becoming worse and she finally scheduled the surgery. Well, OK, I actually scheduled the surgery, but she went along with it :) While that first week was pretty rough, she's done great and has so much pain relief that she's already talking about when she'll have the other one done. We plan to return to Pennsylvania to spend Easter with Andy's family. Andy's brother, Jay, Christina and the kids will be in from Ohio- it will be a great time seeing everyone again. Andy's 94 year-old grandmother has had a few medical issues over the last month, so when she called to see when we were coming home we knew it was important for us to go. All these "firsts" without Paige are so very hard. But, we have no choice but to take them as they come. Since the chances of us becoming pregnant on our own is very low, in October we decided to use the frozen embryos we had remaining from 2000 when Paige was conceived. Being that there is little investigation into the connection of neuroblastoma and invitro-fertilization, we were both a bit hesitant and had initially decided not to use the 5 surviving and just start fresh. But, after a meeting with our Dr. we decided to just give it a try and see what happened. After the thawing process only one of the five survived and the one was transplanted back to me. In mid-October, after an anxious 2 weeks we found out we were pregnant, but my levels were very low and within a week they were back down to zero. So, for whatever reason the pregnancy wasn't meant to be. While there was a bit of hesitation on our part in using them, we're glad we gave them a chance. Soon after we decided to go through In-vitro again, but this time we had to start all from scratch. It meant weeks of daily shots, ultrasounds and lab work. A few days before Christmas we found out we were pregnant again. At our first ultrasound in early January it showed that one of the three embryos had implanted. But, unfortunately the heartbeat was very slow. So, for the next 3 weeks we went for ultrasounds every week, and sadly at the 8 week ultrasound there was no heartbeat. After reading a few studies that showed that fetuses with low heart rates that survived were at higher risk for heart and other congenital defects. So, while we were sad and disappointed, we were relieved in a way. For now we're just going to take a break and go with the flow. On a lighter note... Our sister-in-law, Christina...well, her sister Alex and fiancee JT are getting married in Hawaii (Maui) in late July. Originally, we thought we would be unable to attend since our due date would have been in August had the pregnancy continued. So, right away we decided this would be a great opportunity to get away. We'll be staying on Maui for 10 days as well as Andy's parents, both brothers and their families. It will be so much fun! Well, when you think about Hawaii you also think about the beach and a bathing suit...Yikes! So it's been a great motivation for me to get in shape and take off the 20 pound I gained during the year Paige was sick. I've lost about 15 pounds and hoping to lose another 20 by the time we leave :) Many of you have asked about the progress of the playroom. Well, Hurley is planning to renovate the entire pediatric floor and they've received the OK to relocate and enlarge the playroom during the renovation. We're still not sure when the renovations will start, but they're shooting for this summer. While we could work on the existing playroom, we decided to wait so we have more room to work with. It will be awesome when it's finished. We'll be sure to let you know when we hear anything new. We hope everyone is doing well and we thank you for continuing to visit Paige's website. Keeping her memory alive is so important and the website is a great way. I've received numerous e-mails from other families whose children have sadly been diagnosed with this horrible disease. They've commented on how helpful Paige's website has been. It's nice to know that we can help others and we continue to pray for those families daily. Take care and I promise to update sooner in the future :) Love, Andy & Sandi |